27 September 2011


Sorry I have not updated in a few days, we have been quite busy around here! This past Friday my husband took the day off so we could take part in a big deal event here in our community. Afterwards we decided to visit local business to see if we could leave our bake sale fliers with them for their customers (PRaise the Lord only two said no!) When Willow and I hopped back in the car from leaving fliers at one of the local businesses, hubby was on the phone...my phone. Odd I thought, who in the world would call me that would make him answer the phone?! It was our foster agency and they had a baby who was leaving NICU and six days old and they needed a home for him and he would be at our house in TWO hours.


It was a circus from that point on! We had nothing baby, NOTHING! A sweet friend of ours did and was gracious enough to let me raid her garage for all things infant while hubby and our children were waiting eagerly at our house in case baby came early!

EXACTLY two hours later baby came, we signed four gazillion peices of paper and two case workers left. It was surreal, truly. I told a friend, this is preparing us for our adoption. We have done all this work and will continue to do work and then we will travel to Ind#a, sign papers and S will be ours. WOW!

Our friend was being ordained that night so as we shut the front door we loaded up this darling little guy in our suburban and headed for an hour drive to our friends church. We sat on the back pew still in a whirlwind from the last few hours events and just gazed at this tiny baby. We were like a three ring circus on the back pew. Our kiddos were clammering to look at him, touch him, stare at him. They were so excited and it was hard to keep their excitment contained! Our friends may not speak to us again :).

The last few days we have been getting into a routinue. Yesterday was our first day of school and it went beautifully. We are not naive that this will not always be the case but wow it was great!

We have a court hearing next week that hubs will attend. Please pray for babies mom. Hubs is praying he can get just a few moments to talk to her and ask her if we can pray for her. We have been taking lots of pictures of baby and he plans to ask her if she would like them. We know she is loved by our heavnly father. I admit that my flesh gets angry but we all deserve to burn, none of us deserve grace but we are ALL the same regardless of our sins. We are all sinners and we all deserve to be treated the way our heavenly father treats and loves us. She is a broken woman who needs the Lord. Pray for her with us please. Please also pray the Lord would give hubs the right words. We by NO MEANS want to seem better than her, we just want her to know that we care about her, so does our heavenly father and that we are praying for her and that she is loved, worthy and has value.

If it is not the Lords will that baby go back to mom, please begin praying the Lord would prepare the most fabulous family to adopt him. They may not even know the Lord has adoption in their future but the Lord does!

Everyone has asked us if we are going to keep baby. No. We consider it a HUGE honor and blessing to be able to love on this little guy and give him a temporary home rather than a shelter until the Lord reveals his plan for this little guy. HUGE honor and blessing. It makes me even more grateful for the aunties who have been loving on our son 9,000 miles away for all of these years. I pray Gods abundent blessings on their heads, lives and families for being his family until the day the Lord brings him to our house.

23 September 2011

Surrender Some

I will say to the Lord, "He is my refuge and my fortress; My God, in Him I will trust." Psalm 91:2

Judson W. Van DeVenter penned these words in 1896:

Some to Jesus I surrender,
Some to him I quasi give;
I will ever love and trust him,
In his presence Sunday live.

WAIT! Those aren't the words!
Here is what it really says:

ALL to Jesus I surrender,
ALL to him I FREELY give;
I will ever love and trust him,
In his presence DAILY live.

Surrender by definition means to yield (something) to the possession or power of another; to give up, abandon, or relinquish (comfort, hope, etc.); to yield or resign (an office, privilege, etc.) in favor of another.

As a whole it is typically hard for one to surrender, when we surrender we are no longer in control and by human nature everyone enjoys control of something so we feel life is in "order." But God calls us to a higher standerd. We need to surrender ALL to Him, A.L.L.

I think we would be lying if we said "YES, I have this mastered and I give it all to Him and hold on to nothing for myself." At some point we have all struggled with surrendering all.

I vividly remember the first day I truly gave it all to Christ. I was standing at our kitchen sink a few days out from giving birth to our second child. The doctors said some tests looked like she could have a serious kidney problem and in RARE cases it results in death. I was washing my hands and remember praying "Lord, you blessed us with this child for a reason, she is not ours but yours. Give us strength and endurance as we walk this journey and thank you for the grace that is big enough to cover us. If it is your will to take her, then I have to trust in you, if it is Your will that she have a disease that could ratically affect her little life, then we trust You." By the time I was done, I was sobbing, not because I was afraid, but because I had complete peace that HE was in control. I was not holding on to a small fragment of the situation in hopes that I could control the situation, I laid it at the cross and kept walking.

We are blessed to say that she is healthy and fine, regardless the peace that covered me that day is something I have never forgotten and it is something I strive harder than ever for. About a year later, our oldest daughter was actually diagnosed with a rare issue that will live with her forever. She is monitored by doctors closely but each of them say she is a miracle that none of the "typical" issues or side effects have occured to her. The day we got the call once more I had to lay it at His feet and trust in Him that His grace will cover us and sustain us when we need it.

Now, as we walk the adoption road we have to lay it all at His feet. EVERY LAST BIT. Seems easy, but when your flesh sees things that could only get worked out by God, the flesh/enemy fight to get the glory. The end of this journey has been written by someone better than I, the story has been written by someone who could only write such a beautiful story, so why surrender some? Why not give it ALL to Him? Why not throw our hands up and say "LORD, we are yours, do with us and our family as you will, show us what and where to go and we will do it." If we do, I know the Lord will show us HIS will, in HIS time, thru HIS story.

Why miss a blessing like that?

20 September 2011

Wall Art

I was not born with crafty abilities. AT.ALL.

I got an idea to paint the US on one and India on the other, and to put a heart where we live and then when we got a refferal put a heart where our blessing lived. In July when I got the idea to paint canvas' I surprised myself most of all! Then I dragged my feet in fear they may not turn out okay. One day I found myself wandering aimlessly in Hobby Lobby and there, in the middle of the isle were 16 x 20 canvas' calling my name. I took them home and hoped for the best.

The paint lines show up in the pictures but when you are looking at them in person, they don't show up. After I took the pictures, we added a bright red heart where we are, and a bright red heart where "S" is, but since I am determined to blog under anonymity I didn't show bloggy land where any of us live. :)

These canvas' turned out better than I had hoped, so much so that since the boys room is a construction zone, I am going to paint construction trucks on canvas' for the boys room. Then for above their beds I plan to have a cement truck "pouring" one of their names, and a dump truck "dumping" the others name! Careful world, this crafty stuff has been fun!

12 September 2011

Sisterly Love

Matthew 18:3 “Assuredly, I say to you, unless you are converted and become as little children, you will by no means enter the kingdom of heaven."

In so many ways time seems to be standing still, yet in others it is flying by. We are counting down the days until October 1st!

Our sweet friends have offered to make delicious goodies, and we ourselves (including three lovely assistants) have been busy making sweet treats for our upcoming bakesale. Willow told us she needed to work on things and would be back in a bit. Hmmm, I wonder what that sweet girl is up to.

Turns out she was up to this:

Our darling daughter made crafts to sell at the bakesale! She told us the price and told us she wanted to sell these things, so that she could help bring her brother home as well. She went on to tell us that she has been praying for God to send hundreds of people to our bake sale, then she said, "well I asked Him to send people until the whole table is empty."

Her daddy happened to be home and both of our hearts melted. Such a sweet, selfless thing to do, and it is just confirmation that our whole family is preparing to bring "S" home. Her prayer? Precious and humbling reminding us that we should pick up her prayer and pray the same thing with her!

This sweet girl has been OVER THE MOON about adoption since we started this journey, and her heart aches and longs to have him home as well. She talks of the things she longs to teach him, the things she longs to ask him about his country (she wants to help make him a Life book). She too is not naive as to the challenges that lay ahead. She is wise beyond her years and when she talks of challenges that only we have discussed behind closed doors as adults, it goes to show us that she gets it. Willow is a wonderful daughter and an excellent sister who longs to give a sweet little boy hugs.

So pray with us that the Lord sends people until the entire table is empty!

07 September 2011

Stepping forward

We spoke with the agency and sent in our inquiry form for this precious little boy last week. Ind*a is changing their adoption laws so we have to wait until October 1 to be able to get his medical records. The LORD knows the reason for this wait, and we are trusting in HIM and His goodness!

From there we have to officially be with their agency and pay their agency fees. When you do a traditional adoption, your agency fees are spread out over the course of your adoption (which for us would have been two years plus possible up to another year for travel) because "S" is a "waiting child" they are due within the next few weeks!
We have to submit our state homestudy. The h.s. will release his records for medical review...which we really plan to use for informational purpose and to be able to meet with surgeons to go over possible future surgeries. From there we must work on getting an international homestudy. These were all things we (again speaking in SELF not CHRIST!) had planned to have ready over the course of time, and then work on gathering the rest of our dossier paperwork. Once we have it finished, it will all go to India for acceptance. We have been told to prepare that it takes 9-12 months once India receives your dossier to approve it and approve travel. Which means from the day that I type this post we are looking at up to 15 months. Obviously it could take less or longer, but while we wait we long to give him hugs. We long to tell him he has a home. IF we have everything finalized by December/January we very well may receieve a wonderful Christmas present next year!!

15 months of knowing who this little boy is and knowing that he is sitting in an orphanage, rather than sitting in our arms.

We knew we were facing a wait of UP to 3 years (at the very longest) but honestly, this makes a mommas heart sad. I appreciate a sweet friends journey which is similar who has been waiting 21 months for ONE signature and them to release that paper for them to bring their daughter home.

God continues to give us peace that HE has paved a way to make this journey and we consider it a privledge to be able to take this time to learn how to pray for him during this wait and for when he comes home.

We are busy preparing for the bake sale October 1st so mark your calendars if you are local!

05 September 2011

What Now?

If you missed the first post go here.

Joshua 1:9 "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and of good courage, do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go!"

The lady who changed our lives sent us some basic info on him and while we were blessed with a lot of information on him the two things we knew for certain were 1)he is a waiting child and 2)he has special needs. Two did not matter, one meant that this was God saying "you have a fast pass to move to the front of the line!" Without going into everything, this summer was a lot of refining and talking to the Lord about this very thing. It was confirmation from the Lord.

We were up until 1:30 a.m. talking, asking questions, praying, crying, repeating.

ONE thing we knew for sure that God loves this little boy so much that He sent him to me for a reason. Our prayer was that God show us with clarity and peace if this little boy was our son, if he wasn't we thanked God for allowing us to be a vessel in this little boy finding a forever home and asked that the Lord show us where his forever home was.

The next morning was a daze, my legs were like jello, my arms were like jello and every hair on my body was still standing, and my sweet husband was more quiet than usual. We prayed together again and he left for work. It was the crack-o-dawn and knew that one of my closest friends was busy getting her daughter ready for school, but that an amazing godly woman (who the Lord recently put in our life)was up. So as I dialed, I prayed that she would still be my friend after we got off the phone. She prayed with me and there were more tears. (I am happy to say that she is still my friend!).

Once I knew my friends daughter was tucked nicely into her school room I called my friend. They have walked the path of adoption, so much so that she will tell you she said "Lord you are going to have to drop a baby in my lap" and HE DID! She gave me sweet words of encouragment and reminded me that when they adopted their daughter they did not have the financial resources at the time to bring her home either (they had three months!). She reminded me that it is not our economy we are working under, but that ultimately it is God's economy we are under and it all belongs to Him and He controls it all. I got off the phone with more tears (notice a trend yet!!).

The end of the evening brought us together to join together talking to the Lord.

This little boy has a medical condition, he has had surgery and very well may need surgery again in the near future. This was NEVER a concern for us, but God blessed us with the ability to learn the diagnosed name and what medical journey he has already been on, and what complications he may face in life and what may need to be done to correct it.

I started praying for his parents in a different light. I prayed that the Lord would strip them of any burden they may carry from abandoning a precious boy born with a medical need (3rd world country!). I prayed that the Lord would show them that he was okay and that the Lord would give them a peace for his well being and future.

The next morning our couples devotional was on Pslam 139:14. More tears. This sweet boy is fearfully and wonderfully made! God made this boy for a reason! (more tears). Later in the day the Lord laid Jeremiah 29:11 on my heart. The Lord has plans of good and not of evil to bring this little boy a FUTURE and HOPE. I went to the bathroom and wrote those two verses with his orphanage given name filled in and claimed those to Jesus.

Later on during the same day, one of the most amazing godly women we have had the privledge of knowing called to check in and chat as she drove home from the birth of her darling nephew. I felt the Lord prompting me to tell her what had been happening in the last 35 plus hours. She said "your not going to believe this, but remember my friend that you helped me send her to Aggieland adoptions? She has ____ (the EXACT same thing this little boy has) her doctor is at a very well known and local hospital and he is the doctor who invented this solution because of this woman!!! Not only that, but my sweet friends sister in law is a pediatric nurse at a super fabulous children's hospital that we are very familiar with, and she went on to say that her sil would be happy to help with any questions we may have.

I hung up the phone and cried, and dialed my husbands number with trembling hands. He was about to go into a meeting so when I finished we got off the phone.

At the close of the business day my husband walked in the door and said "your conversation was what I prayed for all day, we need to pursue this precious little boy."

More tears. Rejoicing. More prayers.

***another side note, our youngest children were terrible that day. TERRIBLE. My body looked like a chew toy filled with bite marks from children who have long outgrown the biting stage. Without a doubt we know that it was spiritual warfare. At one point I kept telling one of them to say "satan get behind me" they refused and their beahvior got worse. We repeated this for an extensive period of time. Spiritual warfare, people. Satan is throwing a raging fit which just means that Abba Father has something incredible in store!***

While most would chalk this all up to being "coinsidences", we WITHOUT A DOUBT know that God has been laying the pathwork all along and continues to lay the foundation of our story. This is all God's handiwork, not forces of nature, not random happenstances, NO this is GOD!

His file is not with our agency, but it is with an agency that a friend of ours used (who sent me an email in June telling me about!).

My fear was money. WE (notice the fleshly tone hear?) had a beautiful Excel Dave Ramsey spread sheet as to how we would be able to pay for this adoption over the course of a typical "wait" period. The reality is, we don't have it now, and caused me fear. My calm, cool, and collective husband said "it will be okay."

We have a short matter of time to come up with a huge chunk of change because that means, new agency fees, homestudy fees, etc. So please if the Lord wills you, share our journey with others, and if by any chance he lays it on your heart to help bring this little boy home we would be ever so grateful! We know that the Lord will provide if this is His will, so please pray with us and for us!!!

"By faith we understand that the worlds were framed by the word of God, so that the things which are seen were not made of things which are visible." Hebrews 11:3. It will truly be thru Christ and with Faith alone that we bring this little boy home. HOME.

It's a . . . WHAT?!?

When we began this journey, we both said we would adopt a girl. We had chosen a girl because of Ind*as staggering and ever changing rates on child trafficking and the number of young girls involved in the "red light district" business. We felt if we rescued ONE, that would be one less that the enemy could use in a horrible lifestyle.

And then I wrote this post. And we began a journey that can only be planned by Christ.

The following will be a list of things that have stood out in our minds over the course of a very short to us time, which leads us to where I am going with this glaze your eyes over post, but I am begging praying that you will read to the end.

*FOR YEARS we have had friends who worked with agencies who have sent us emails with precious children's faces from all around the world and other than that little indian girl who captured my heart years ago NONE have made me long for them, they made me pray harder for their future and their home and that when the time was right the Lord would show us....I even confess to searching T.A.R.E. for children that maybe God would somehow let me know if that was our child. :)

*In January some sweet and amazing friends family came for a week of laughter, sillyness, political "discussions" and how to solve the worlds problems in five days. With them they brought their totally cool and awesome sons size 5 and 6 wardrobe. I was GRATEFUL, but on the inside I was selfish! "Where will I store these for the next 3-4 years until Hunter can wear them? is what I said on the inside" SELFISH, I tell ya! Oh, how I am a terribly ungrateful friend! I tucked the clothes away and never gave them another thought.

*All summer long we spent looking for bunk beds for the girls room, we started hunting even harder once we moved (hey, one less thing to move we thought) and our search kept coming up empty. A few weeks ago I searched psycho'slist and found some really awesome looking bunkbeds but they were far to manly for a girls room. I shot the owner an email and she replied back offering them to me at a significantly lower than listed price. REJOICED for this awesome find! Then we realized, crud the boy needs a mattress (he has been on a full size bed until now). But wait, SHAZAM a city down the road's groupon was for Mattress firm! Holy smokes, God you are blessing us with some awesome finds! THANK YOU, THANK YOU LORD!

We were so grateful, Hunter loves his bunk beds with built in desk and dresser, but we continued the hunt for some girly ones for the girls room.

(get up and stretch your legs, it is about to get good!)

From about mid-week of the first week of August I was awaken every. night. with dreams/visions of a little boy. He had dark hair, dark skin, dark eyes, and the whitest teeth you have ever seen. e.v.e.r.y. n.i.g.h.t. This beautiful little boy had a name. I told my husband about it, and we both felt it was the Lord telling us we had a little African American boy here (via foster care or maybe answering Willows prayer that one day we adopt from Africa) that HE had set aside for our family. His face started coming to me during the day as well, I literally could see his entire face. I felt crazy, nothing like this had ever happened to me before. So with that craziness I kept asking God for clarity on what this meant.

Then I put all our business on facebook and wrote that post about how we knew God was going to knock our socks off....

Someone sent me a private email offering someone else's info who was adopting from India as well. I shot this other person an email with a link to this blog (gasp, someone would know what I am writing now!)and introduced myself and told her since there were so few of us adopting from India I thought it was a HUGE blessing to be able to follow someone elses journey.

She emailed me back and said these words "I know of an incredible 5 year old boy who would be a great son!"

Son. Huh. 5 years old. Huh ( This post talks about how one of us felt led to a 5-6 year old. ) I replied with something and went and spoke to my husband.

We sat in the office and chatted about all sorts of things. Every hair on my body stood straight up and I glanced at the computer to see that this woman had replied. I clicked on her email, and there in front of my face was the VERY SAME BOY that the Lord had sent to me in my dreams for weeks! E.X.A.C.T.L.Y I could not hold back the tears, what in the world does this mean Lord? I sobbed. We sat confused, full of questions, and prayed. We filled Heaven with prayers asking for wisdom and guidence...and cried some more.

If you don't believe the Lord can move in amazing ways, you better not read the next post because I can guarantee you, you may be forced to admit that this world is not Mother Earth and that we did not just all get here by happenstance!

Part two can be found here.